Sunday, September 14, 2014

Agent Dale Cooper in my bathroom.

I've been inspired by my recent bathroom Ghoulie-athon upgrade. My other bathroom, in comparison, is terribly bland and uninspiring. No knick-knacks line the cabinet, no decor to add spice, no juice to add flavor. Because when I poop, I wanna poop with a purpose.

We recently painted the walls in the bathroom a soft, blue-ish color, something that will hopefully sooth and massage your senses while committing natural crimes. I'm not sure if that's working because all I wanna do is cover the walls with junk and posters and fun stuff.

The blue, for whatever reason, gives off a cool vibe, something that feels like a stroll through the sweet pine trees of a northern Washington forest. A kind of "dead-skin blue," if you will. Something that feels...Twin Peaks.

I love Twin Peaks! I love coffee and pie! I love David Lynch! I love the idea of turning the tiny area of my place where I floss my teeth into a tribute/shrine/altar to the Twin Peaks Universe!

Now, in a perfect world, I'd hunt down rare and authentic pieces of decor actually used on the show, but no one got time for dat. Maybe a moose head, or a neon diner sign above the towel racks. Fortunately, I am willing to settle for cheap posters and the only cheap posters I could immediately find (not including fan-made artwork) topped off at three, so it made the ordeal a whole lot quicker and easier to swing. Surf the web, enter a few credit card numbers and we're in business. Two weeks later and my vision is coming to life.

And boy, this vision shore is nifty!

First, I had to get the movie poster for the film, "Fire Walk With Me." It's an obvious grab, but it does the job. To build a house, you must first build the foundation, my pappy used to say.

I'm more of a fan of the TV series, but this is a nice shot of Laura Palmer that isn't dead and wrapped up in plastic. That would be too easy, folks!

Please excuse the blurriness of the photo -- it was taken as quickly as possible. I felt weird being in a bathroom by myself with a camera.

Round two, featuring Agent Dale Cooper and...that other guy. Whatever his name is c'mon I forget I'm a big fan though don't judge me.

This one is good because it features two of the main characters (double-dose) as well as a whole row of doughnuts. Arguably, one would surmise that a plate of pie would be more accurate to the show, but I'll take what I can get.

I like this photo because of it's TV-ad appeal. It's wild that someone is selling an image used for an Entertainment Weekly magazine or TV guides of a bygone era, which I like. I like the little ABC logo on top, too. I like the kitsch. The hokey-ness. I JUST LIKE IT OKAY

And finally...

The cream! The icing! The great Sherilyn Fenn!

Sheriflyn Fenn, known as "Audrey" on the show, is one of the best characters on the show. Why? I believe she said some stuff, had a few good lines, maybe even contributed to plot points and general flow of the series. And because she's super hot duh.

I've never framed an 8 x 10 photo of anything before, especially not of an actual person. It's got an aura of creepiness, which, obviously, is very cool. It feels like we're friends, like we know each other!  Me and Sherilyn, together at last!

Now if I could only snag a signature! To dream!

Not only would I feel like we're one in the same, meant to be together, etc., I'd feel like I'd be showering in a popular comedy club or the local, New York deli.

"Best bathroom in all of Arizona...try the Reuben!"

Thanks, babe!

1 comment:

  1. I too, am a Twin Peaks obsessed fanboy! (BTW, the Sheriff's name is Harry S. Truman!). In fact, at one point, I had a bedroom in an apartment that was wallpapered in Twin Peaks pics (including the same FWWM poster). The centerpiece of it all? A signed photo of Sherilyn Fenn! Yes, in my lovesick early twenties I sent her a fan letter...and she sent me a signed 8x10! was probably her agent or something that signed it for her...but I'm gonna pretend like she saw my letter, wiped away the tear of joy my words brought to her eye, and happily signed the photo that she personally mailed back to me!