Monday, January 9, 2012

"Monstrous Menagerie" Mask!

Me like!

Cheap rubber mask is fun and thrilling, good to wear or use as a small brick in the house of junk you've built in your tiny apartment. Me think it more like mansion, which is dumb thing to say, 'cause how can mansion fit in apartment? Me brain hurts.

Point is, me think hoarders got nothing on me. Me now have smelly mask to dance around and be wild and carefree while dancing around, making the dance all the more fantastic because there's a troll face on me face. Me favorite thing to do today, even though me think it's not holiday-appropriate.

You see, me want to show more of me Christmas haul, but me take side route into mask wearing and picture taking. Me feel like sexy model! Can you deny me sexy model time? Who does you think you are, anyway?

Me no worry, though. Me no cheat on Christmas. Me live a vicarious lifestyle that blends holidays together. One day it Easter, the next day it be Thanksgiving. Today? Today is January 9th, Hallow-fucking-ween.

Me know absurdity run rampant, but me also know that all the holidays are gone and me left with boring January to comfort me through these tough times. Is it Valentine's Day next? When is Labor Day? Do people eat cake and get drunk on Columbus Day? This is all me have, don't take it away from me. Say me, "Let us rejoice! Let us indulge in a monster mask!"

I like me "Monster Menagerie" mask because it makes Mondays so much more fun. Me know it's cliche, but me hate Mondays. If I won the lottery and high-fived Johnny Depp tonight, this Monday would still suck. Me think it's somethign in the air, a natural doom and gloom mood you're stuck with until Tuesday morning. Oh well.

If I could run errands with this on, me life would be all the more entertaining. Unfortunately, me do have errands to run, but me would much rather sit in me apartment, face buried inside this rubbery Fortress of Solitude. Me think groceries will have to come another day. Me have no shame eating old teriyaki sauce and Raisinettes for dinner tonight.

Me not sure why this need another picture. Me think one would be enough to get the point across, but one cannot question the beauty and triumph of this mask. Look at the droopy eye, the cherry-red tongue, the snarled and crooked teeth. It's like wearing a mask of me own face! Double Halloween Surprise!

Tommorow comes soon, me had me fun. Thank you, Monster Menagerie Mask. Maybe see you next Monday.


  1. Me wish me would have started reading you blogs forever love nonsense you blog missed Calabrese concert March 24th now me fucking bummed the fuck out...fuck me life.